Let's figure it out: Centerpieces

This is the first installment of "Let's figure it out" is all about wedding centerpieces. This has kind of been at the bottom of my priority list for a few reasons:

1. My reception location provides generic centerpieces (mirror with votive candles or a small white vase with fresh flowers of my choice).
2. Do people really care and remember centerpieces? I've been to a lot of weddings the past 2 years and I can remember one of the centerpieces
3. They can't be that time consuming to create, right?

I recently had a craft night with my bridesmaids and the topic of centerpieces came up. I knew I wanted to use cut wine bottles (recycled from my friend Kate's wedding) and have the table number/name somewhere on the centerpiece. We started playing around with one of the cut bottles and an empty bottle we had to see what looked best, and it was a LOT more difficult that I thought. There is a fine line between too minimal and way too much, and just adding small things like ribbon and lights made drastic changes to the look of the whole thing.

I am a wannabe DIY diva, so I have lots of ideas and I tend to like everything I see on pinterest but my execution of my ideas rarely go as planned. One of my bridesmaids has taught me the mantra of "Less is more." because it is really easy to get carried away with the lights, flowers and glitter.

My advice to to start with the largest part of your centerpiece, for me that would be the wine bottles, and consider the following:

1. Does it go with your theme and/or color scheme?
2. Does it hinder conversation at the table? (My personal pet peeve)
3. Does it look lazy? (ie: Sprinkling confetti on each table)
4. How much would it be for all of the tables?
5. Can it be duplicated?

Then build out from the largest part. A good centerpiece compliments the reception location, doesn't take up a large portion of the table, sparks instead of hinders conversation and is symmetrical. While creating my centerpieces, we experimented with varying heights, lights, ribbon, tulle and LED candles. When we finally thought we had something, I went to take a picture for my fiance and I realized that it we created something with a beautiful front, and a unappealing back.

The last thing to consider with centerpieces is who will be putting them up for you. Some people are able to put up their own based on when they have access to their reception site, but others are not that lucky. Pick out people you trust and take pictures of your completed centerpieces and leave instructions if there are extra steps (ie pulling out the battery tabs in the LED tea lights). I cannot brag about my reception site (Alpine Banquets, in Darien IL) enough, they actually will set up the centerpieces for you so that way no one needs to stress about the set up of the banquet hall.

And as always remember to give yourself plenty of time and plenty of supplies when crafting. I made bags for my bridesmaids when I asked them, and I am embarrassed by how many times I had to go back to Michael's to get more supplies.

I am always trying to make my wedding planning more fun, so I held a girls/craft night for my bridesmaids where we made shirts, worked on save the dates and played around with centerpiece set ups. We had a ton of fun and got a ton done. No one said you have to do this all alone.

--the southside bride

When to start wedding planning?

Everyone says to enjoy your engagement before plunging into planning. But depending on the type of person you are wedding planning can be like quick sand. I told myself that I would give myself at least a month to really enjoy being engaged before starting in on the planning.

But then these top three things kept reoccurring

1. "Congratulations! So... have you thought about when the wedding will be?"
Problem: Literally, these conversations started less than an hour after I was engaged. And I get it. People find out your engaged, they are excited and they want to keep the conversation call rolling. But when you constantly get asked, its easy to start doing research on which dates would be good possible wedding dates and then all of a sudden you are looking at banquet halls and vendors and BOOM. Suddenly you went from newly engaged to borderline bridezilla.
How to fix/avoid this:  Change the topic back to the engagement. I am blessed enough to have one of the most incredible proposal stories, so it was easy for me to say "Well we aren't sure yet, but did I tell you how long he has been hiding my ring?!" Bring up little details so that way the person you're conversing with still feels as if they kept the ball rolling and you get to buy yourself more time.

2. I'll just peak at pinterest/theknot/weddingbee...just for general ideas
Problem: Maybe you just started a private wedding board on pinterest because you like wedding things, or a "dream" wedding board because well ONE day you planned to be married. Or maybe you just became engaged and you want to see what the big deal with theknot is and you create your account. Fast forward a few hours and now you have hundreds of ideas and at the moment they all seem possible so it only makes sense to discuss most of them with your beau. And then the real problem becomes either the people who follow you on social media seeing these pins and ideas and telling others what you're planning. Example: I made a fourth of july wedding board simply because it seemed like a fun idea. I get a call a week later from my great auntie asking me why I didn't tell her I picked a wedding date because its "all over the internet" and people are already planning their summer around it.
How to fix/avoid this: If you simply cannot resist the wedding websites early on in the engagement, make them private. It sounds selfish at first, but as you progress in your wedding planning you learn the less people know about your wedding plans, the easier it makes your life. I was shocked when my little 80+ year old auntie brought up my pinterest board because I never thought my relatives paid that close of attention to what I posted. I will admit that I have made a few blunders with telling too much to people early on in my planning. Early on in our brainstorming we were looking at traditional church weddings, but as my fiance and I started to lay things out, we decided to go in another direction and that change really threw some people off and actually upset them. A wedding represents one of the most intimate moments you'll have with the person you love, so why not take things slow and close to the chest.

3. I've had this planned out my entire life, if I just hurry up and get it all done I can enjoy being engaged after. 
Problem: You have been talking about your wedding since before you can remember. And you may have even had a lot "planned" out before you even met your better half, an insert groom here wedding plan. Maybe you are even like me and had a wedding spread sheet with real numbers, names and outlines done before you were even engaged. But you learn pretty quickly, that a wedding really shouldn't be planned in less than a month (unless absolutely necessary). The planning is really part of the fun and rushing just leads to quick decisions you may not be able to change later.
How to fix/avoid this: I wish someone told me to start over with a blank slate. I went into planning with my spreadsheets, pinterest dream boards and high expectations and blindsided my fiance who still was on a high from pulling off our epic engagement. He lovingly told me his was overwhelmed and then it hit me. It's his wedding too. We started planning with laying out a budget and making a top 3 list of what mattered to the both of us. Even though I may not be doing everything I laid out when I was 18, I believe by taking our time with the planning has made this all more fun. The current problem we are facing is the wedding checklists, because we are both the kind of people who look at those as a challenge. There are days when we have to talk about it being unrealistic for me to make and store all of my centerpieces now since we will be moving before the wedding.


I recommend taking at least a month to just enjoy yourselves as a newly engaged couple. The wedding timeline can wait! As I said early on planning is like quick sand, you may not even realize how deep you're getting into planning until someone calls you out on it. And when you start planning, start with the budget and be realistic with it. This way when you sit and make your priority list you can really focus on needs vs wants.

Start it right and have fun with it!
--the southside bride